Jack's 33 Favourite Simpsons Episodes.

1. Summer of 4 ft 2
A fantastic end to Season 7, and a nice summery feel good episode. The episode covers a lot of summer related topics which few TV programs seem to cover. I particularly liked Milhouse's impression of all the different sprinklers at the start and his enthusiasm for everything e.g “Oh boy! a carnival!” I also like the American Graffiti parodies and Homer's face when Bart gets “the dud” in Mystery Date and it looks like Milhouse. Lisa's friends have some funny lines; I really like the "I know where I can get some baggettes!" line. It's probably not a lot of peoples favourite episode but I really like this one.

Favourite Moment:
Milhouse: How did it go? Are we down with them?
Bart: No. They must have seen you!

2. Homer The Vigilante

I laughed so much when I first watched this one. The line “So I said to him, "Look, buddy, your car was upside down when we got here. And as for your Grandma, she shouldn't have mouthed off like that!" is pure gold. It's a bit of surreal episode, what with the It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World parody at the end and I'm happy to see an episode with a lot of Grandpa in it. There's not a bad word I can say about this episode. I think this is Jimbo's finest hour.

Favourite Moment:
Homer: You better have a good reason for doing that, boy.
Jimbo: It makes me feel like a big man.
Homer: Let me check my reason list. ...Yep! It's on here.
Jimbo: Hey! You're that drunken posse. Wow...can I join ya?
Homer: [skeptical] I don't know...can you swing a sack of door knobs?
Jimbo: Can I?
Homer: You're in! Here's the sack.
Moe: But you gotta supply your own knobs.

3. Last Exit To Springfield

I've heard a lot of people call this their favourite episode and I think it's probably because so much happens in it. When I watch it I usually think to myself "oh, that's where that scene's from" the writers really put a lot in to this one. I've always enjoyed the mad dentist's performance and the pre-dated stainless steal braces he gives Lisa. Homer's great as always and I think this is the best Burns centred episode, if only for his "Smithers, I'm beginning to think that Homer Simpsons is not the brilliant tactician I thought he was" line, after Homer does his Three Stooges impression.

Favourite Moment:
Burns: We don't have to be adversaries, Homer. We both want a fair union contract.
Homer: [thinking] Why is Mr. Burns being so nice to me?
Burns: And if you scratch my back, I'll scratch yours.
Homer: [thinking] Wait a minute. Is he coming onto me?
Burns: I mean, if I should slip something into your pocket, what's the harm?
Homer: [thinking] My God! He coming onto me!
Burns: After all, negotiations make strange bedfellows. [chuckle] [wink]
Homer: [thinking] Aaaaaagh! [aloud] Sorry, Mr. Burns, but I don't go in for these backdoor shenanigans. Sure, I'm flattered, maybe even a little curious, but the answer is no!

4. Radio Bart

Favourite Moment:
Bart: [over the radio] Rod! Todd! This is God!
Rod: How did you get on the radio?
Bart: Whaddya mean, how did I get on the radio? I created the universe! Stupid kid.
Todd+Rod: [fall to their knees and clasp their hands]
Todd: Forgive my brother. We believe you.
Bart: Talk is cheap. Perhaps I'll test a guy's faith. Walk through the wall! I will remove it for you.
Rod: [walks into the wall] [thud]

5. Bart On The Road

Favourite Moment:
On the road, we meet a man traveling in a station wagon with his
family. He has had about all he can take from his rowdy kids.
"If you kids can't keep your hands to yourselves," he yells, "I'm
gonna turn this car around, and there'll be no Cape Canaveral for
anybody!" The kids instantly quiet down, but Bart's car travels by,
and Nelson, seeing that the window is open, slaps the man on the
head. "That's it!" he yells. "Back to Winnipeg!"

6. Mr. Plow

Favourite Moment:
Agent: Now, before I give you the check, one more question. This place
``Moe's'' you left just before the accident. This is a business of some kind?
Homer: [thinks] Don't tell him you were at a bar! Gasp! But what else is open at night?
[aloud] It's a pornography store. I was buying pornography.
[thinks] Heh heh heh. I would'a never thought of that.

7. Lisa's Substitute

Favourite Moment:
Homer: Hey, just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand!

8. Lemon Of Troy

Favourite Moment:
Homer2: [chuckles] Don't you get it, Springfield? It's over. You lose!
Now if you'll excuse me, all this talk has made me hungry.
[bites into a lemon; his face contorts at the bitterness]

9. Duffless

Favourite Moment:
Guide: What does the future hold for us? Heh. Let's just say we have a few ideas up our sleeve.
Homer: Like what?
Guide: Um, I'd rather not get into it right now.
Homer: Why not?
Guide: All right, we don't have any ideas for the future. We gotnothing. Happy?
Homer: [whiny] No.

10. Itchy & Scratchy: The Movie

Favourite Moment:
Homer: You know, when I was a boy, I really wanted a catcher's mitt,
but my dad wouldn't get it for me. So I held my breath until
I passed out and banged my head on the coffee table.
[cheerily] The doctor thought I might have brain damage.
Bart: Dad, what's the point of this story?
Homer: [cheerily] I like stories.

11. A Star Is Burns

Favourite Moment:
Audience: Boo! Boo!
Burns: Smithers...are they booing me?
Smithers: Uh, no, they're saying "Boo-urns! Boo-urns!"
Burns: Are you saying "boo" or "Boo-urns"?
Audience: Boo! Boo!
Hans: I was saying "Boo-urns"...

12. Darkness Of Bart

13. Homer The Heretic

Favourite Moment:
Homer: And what if we picked the wrong religion? Every week, we're just making God madder and madder!

14. I Love Lisa

Favourite Moment:
Ralph: My parents won't let me use scissors.
Class: [giggles and snickers]
Ms. Hoover: The children are right to laugh, Ralph. These scissors couldn't cut butter. [demonstrates on her arm]

15. Cape Feare

Favourite Moment:
On the TV...

Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen, it's "Up Late with McBain". I'm your
announcer, Corporal Obergruppenfuehrer Wolfcastle. And heeere's McBain!
McBain: Ja, thank you, ja, that's nice. Let's say hello to my music guy, Skoey. [Skoey bows]
That is some outfit, Skoey. It makes you look like a homosexual.
[Audience boos]
Whoa, maybe you all are homosexuals too!
[Audience boos]

16. Homer At The Bat

Favourite Moment:
Smithers: [whispers in Jose Canseco's ear]
Jose: I get $50,000 to play one game?
Smithers: That's right, Mr. Canseco.
Jose: Well, it's a pay cut, but what the hey. It sounds like fun.

17. The Way We Was

Favourite Moment:
Marge: Homer J. Simpson, I never want to see you again!

Marge slams the door and Homer sits there taping his fingers and moving his eyes from side to side. He then picks up the phone and dials.

Homer: Hey Barney! Guess who's got a date for the prom!

18. 22 Short Films About Springfield

Favourite Moment:
Lovejoy: C'mon boy, this is the spot, right here. That's a good boy, do your dirty sinful business.
Ned: Well, howdy, Reverend Lovejoy. Nice to see you there ... on my lawn ... with your dog.
Lovejoy: Oh, oh, ooh, bad dog! Look at that, right on Ned's lawn. Now how could you do such a thing? [quietly to the dog] Good boy, don't stop now. Bad dog, I condemn you to Hell.
Ned: Better get the old snow shovel back from Homer, eh? [leaves]
Lovejoy: [to dog] Good boy, don't stop the music.

19. Homer's Enemy

Favourite Moment:
Lisa: Can I go downstairs and see what Dad's doing?
Marge: I wouldn't bother him, honey. He's making some sort of model for a contest. He says it's really high-tech stuff that we wouldn't understand.
Homer: [opens basement door] Marge, do we have any elbow macaroni and glue-on sparkles?

20. Homer's Barbershop Quartet

Favourite Moment:
Moe: Hey, Barney! What'll it be?
Barney: I'd like a beer, Moe!
Yoko: I'd like a single plum floating in perfume served in a man's hat.
Moe: [reaching under bar] Here you go.

21. Lisa's Sax

Favourite Moment:
Skinner: Now, I want you to knock off that potty talk right now!
Bart: [laughs] The principal said potty!
The kids watching laugh. Skinner shudders in frustration.
Skinner: You listen to me, son. You've just started school, and the path you choose now may be the one you follow for the rest of your life! Now, what do you say?
[Bart looks at Skinner, then Jimbo. It's his moment of truth.]
Bart: Eat my shorts.
Skinner: All right, I'll ea...eat your shorts?!
Bart: Yeah, eat my shorts! [singing to "Batman" theme] Buttman! Na na na na na na na na, Buttman!
"Buttman?!" Principal Skinner exclaims before dragging Bart off.

22. Marge vs the Monorail

Favourite Moment:
Bart: True or false? You can get mono from riding the monorail.
Homer: False! Oh, no wait, it might be true.
Bart: [Proudly] No, it's true.

23. Homer's Phobia

Favourite Moment:
Homer: Bart, I want you to shake hands with...what's your name?
Man: Rosco.
Homer: Rosco here runs this mill, he's going to show us round and let you have a look at good ol' American joes doing what they do best.
Bart: Why the hell would I want to see that?
Homer: [lifts hand to his mouth] You'll thank me on your wedding night.
--------------------------------
Rosco: Hey, listen up,I want all of you to say hellos to the simpsons.
Workers: [Camp] Hello!
Homer: Has the whole world gone insane!
Worker 1: Stand still there's a spark in your hair!
Worker 2: Get it, get it!
Worker 3: Hot stuff coming through.
Bart: Dad, why did you bring me to a gay steel mill?
Homer: I don't know! This is a nightmare! You're all sick!
Worker 4: Oh, be nice!
Homer: Oh, my son doesn't stand a change; the whole worlds gone gay!
[Horn sounds]
Homer: Oh God, what's happening now!
Rosco: We work hard, we play hard!
A disco ball drops down and Gonna make you sweat (everybody dance now) plays.

24. Stark Raving Dad

Favourite Moment:
Hello, you have reached the New Bedlam ``Wrongly Committed'' Hot-line.
All of our operators are currently busy. Please stand by. Play's Patsy Cline's Crazy.
[Marge sobs]

25. Two Bad Neighbors

Favourite Moment:
Bart: Hello Mr. Bush!

26. Homer Loves Flanders

27. Favourite Moment:
Homer: [gasps] Duck! I can't let the boys see me with you!
Ned: What?
Homer: [grunts, pushes Ned down] Hi!
Lenny: Hey! Look, Homer's got one of those robot cars! [the car crashes]
Carl: One of those _American_ robot cars.

28. Krusty Gets Kancelled

Favourite Moment:
Krusty: I've had plenty of guys come after me, and I've buried them all. Sea Captain. Joey Bishop.
Pennycandy: Don't forget the Special Olympics.
Krusty: [wistfully] Oh, yeah... I slaughtered the Special Olympics!

29. Bart's Comet

Favourite Moment:
Quimby: Now, here's what we think the impact might look like. Show
them, Jerry.
[first slide shows arrows pointing to "Springfield" and the
"Comet"]
[second slide shows collision of two and an arrow pointing to
"Moe's"]
Moe: Oh, dear God, no!
[third slide shows smoking crater with arrows pointing to
"Charred Bodies"]
Quimby: Fortunately we have a plan: Professor Frink?
Frink: Nn-hey, good evening, ladies and --
Man: [hysterical] Quit stalling! What's the plan?
Frink: All right, just take your seat, just take your seat.
[pulls a sheet off a model of the city]
Now, working with former Carter Administration officials and
military men who were forced into early retirement for various
reasons which we won't go into here, nn-hey, we have planned
this defense for the city: [flicks a switch] as the comet
hurtles towards the city, our rocket will intercept it and blow
it to smithereens.
[little models of the comet and rocket demonstrate]
[the comet explodes and catches "Moe's" on fire]
Moe: Oh, dear God, no!

30. Itchy & Scratchy Land

Favourite Moment:
Bart: Look at all this great stuff, Lis!
[finds vanity license plate rack]
Cool...personalized plates! "Barclay"..."Barry"..."Bert"...
"Bort"? Aw, come on. "Bort"?
Child: Mommy, mommy! Buy me a license plate.
Mother: No. Come along, Bort.
Man: Are you talking to me?
Mother: No, my son is also named Bort.

31. Boy-Scoutz N The Hood

Favourite Moment:
Homer: Water, water, everywhere, so let's all have a drink.

32. Lisa the Iconoclast

Favourite Moment:
Comic book guy: Question: is your name Ridley Scott or James Cameron?
Homer: No, it's Homer.
Comic book guy: Then I would thank you to stop peering at my screenplay, _Homer_. And if I see a movie where computers threaten our personal liberties, I will know you have stolen my idea.
Homer: But I'm just waiting for my kid. [thinking] Mental note -- steal his idea.

33. Lisa's First Word

Favourite Moment:
Marge: I'm afraid we're going to need a bigger house.

Homer: No, we won't. I've got it all figured out. The baby can have
Bart's crib and Bart'll sleep with us until he's 21.
Marge: Won't that warp him?
Homer: My cousin Frank did it.
Marge: You don't have a cousin Frank.
Homer: He became Francine back in '76. Then he joined that cult. I
think her name is Mother Shabubu now.